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I stopped writing poems. Not because I didn’t like to write them but because I lost the words. Then something happened and I just started to write. I don’t know what I was thinking at that moment. Or how I was really feeling. This is the first poem I’ve written in ages. Since then I’ve written four others. The last which I posted last night.

When I began to write this particular poem I thought it was going to be one of those love poems or one of those poems where I’m all appreciative and crap. I wasn’t prepared for what came out. You see, I have a complicated life. A life where I have the ability to love more than one person, truly love. People may not understand it. People may not believe it. But, it’s me. It hasn’t been easy. I lost a partner because he couldn’t understand.

All of that to say, when I penned this I was thinking about writing something for that particular partner. The one who said he loved me but didn’t love the way I loved. Instead I wrote about someone else. It was weird to see on paper that the secret was out. A secret that I’ve kept hidden for years.

So, to you that will never know. I loved you once. I love you still. xoxo

When It Happened

I wonder when it happened
Maybe when you sang to me
Or laughed
Or held my hand
I don’t know when it happened
Something was brewing
A manipulation of my mind
I fell in love with you

Like hands of a masonry
I watched us intricately
Weave together
Our unspoken love
I don’t know when it happened
But it did happen
I fell in love with you

It became my little secret
A secret I’d never tell
Watching as the world unfolded
Where life became hectic
I don’t know when it happened
But I clung to you
When no one else was to be found
I fell in love with you

One night it became clear
So transparent to me
Like butter paper
And ground glass
I don’t know if that’s when it happened
Lighting up the dark
Together hand in hand
I was in love with you