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I slept through the night last night. And when I awoke I immediately looked at my phone to see if you called or texted. But, you didn’t. I turned over and felt for him, the staple in my life. He lay there sleeping heavily. 

Then, it hit me. I feel nothing. I don’t hurt. I’m not angry. I’m not sad. Just indifferent. You sobered yourself up to put on a smiley face for my mom and just left me. She doesn’t even know we are together, or were. She adores you and you played her. I guess it was better then cancelling on her. But, really what would it matter? She thinks we’re just friends. Her baby girl is happily married after all. 

When things hit and come crashing down I don’t know if I’ll be for the better. All I ever wanted was for everyone to be happy, to communicate. I was foolish to assume that would work. 

I saw something that I’m hoping will help me. It said, I’m too full of life to be half loved. I am, right? xoxo

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